Lizards, Spiders, Frogs, OH MY!!!

Ok, if you live or ever have lived in Florida you know that there are lots of creepy critters down here. And let me tell you, they are 10 times bigger down here then any of the critters up north. This past Saturday I got my fair share of Florida wildlife all in a matter of a couple of hours. I am a BIG chicken shit when it comes to creepy crawly things, i.e. mice, spiders, bugs, etc. Julio, my cat, decides it would be great to bring a lizard into our house. Now, I have somewhat become accustomed to the lizards down here, you have too, they are EVERYWHERE, but I still don't want one in my house. Especially since he didn't kill it first just caught it and LET IT GO inside the house. He eventually caught it again and played with it for a while and then took it off somewhere and I have yet to find it but I assume it is dead now. Then I left, with my family to go to Home Depot, we come back home and as I make an extra trip back out to the car to bring in my bags, a freakin' wolf spider JUMPS off of the house onto my arm and then I fling him onto the ground. Yes, they jump, and they are HUGE, and I swear I think he hissed my name. As if that is not bad enough, I already had to pee extremely bad. I get my bags, drop them inside the door and run back to use the bathroom. I rush in, don't bother to shut the door and proceed to pee. Now, as soon as I stand up I look down and what do I see - EYEBALLS staring back up at me from inside the toliet. A freakin' sewer frog was in my toliet and I had just pissed on his head. I then run screaming through my house with my pants down around my ankles as my husband and kids laugh their asses off at me. *sigh* I am so ready to move back to Indiana.

For those of you that don't live in Florida or anywhere where this occurs, sewer frogs actually come up out of the sewer and get into your house via the toliet. This is only the second time this has happened at our house since we have lived there (almost 4 years.) They are ugly ugly ugly creatures too. They are really pale green, almost white, I guess due to the fact that they don't eat plants and are not in the sunlight. Plus, they get pretty big, this one was definitly not tiny by any means.